Happy birthday Kitkat and thoughts on church

I am so blessed!!! I really am.  I love the mornings. I sit in my recliner sipping coffee and I look out my window at the blue skies, sunshine, hummingbirds looking in and then feeding off the feeder.  The window is open and I smell the fresh air. Animals and papa are all back sleeping.  It is peaceful and is the best feeling in the world. I feel safe and loved and blessed. Everything is right in my world. Thank you, Lord!

There are times I get blue thinking about days gone by when I thought they were the best times of my life and I do miss them.
I miss when the grandkids were younger and I used to take care of them...

I miss when our kids were teenagers...

I miss when they were younger and we would go camping and on car rides...

I miss my parents and rides with them.

But I look at my life today and I love it too. Someday I will miss it and have another part to love (hopefully) and life goes on.

I had a weird dream last night that I went back to Martha and Mary Learning Center where I worked and asked for a part time job. Tammy turned me down.  I was upset. I went from being hired as the Site Coordinator to Site Supervisor plus teacher and now they won't hire me as a part time assistant. It hurt me.  Kind of reminds me of real life.

It is strange how much the church family can hurt people.  It is sad. I don't think it is what God intended. And most of the time it is hidden behind "We prayed about it and...." or "I don't think the Lord wants us to move in that direction."  The worst one being "I don't think it is a good fit."  Really?????  The last time I let a church hurt me was when I applied for a receptionist job they had open.  I passed through all the receptionist, I passed through 4 pastors and everyone thought the job was mine. Until the Senior Pastor came back and said "I don't think you are a good fit." That sure hurt. I fit well enough to be in charge of Children's Church and teach (his own children) but not good enough to answer their phones. Made no sense to me.  We don't attend the church anymore.  I lost respect for the leadership and the other moves they had made removing one of the Pastors who was a great person but apparently didn't fit either?  I understand churches are filled with fallible people. But it is hard to attend if you don't respect.  We have had to leave churches over the years because of different beliefs, our kids, and other leadership problems. We have no church now. I am a bit afraid to involve myself again.  Don't get me wrong....I have made life lasting and life changing friendships from many of these churches. I have people I love and will always love! People who have helped me get through rough patches, people who have supported and loved me unconditionally.  My problem has been leadership...not the friends I have made.  Here are just some of them...

My relationship with the Lord is stronger than ever!  I have grown and been strengthened through so many things Lanny and I have been through over the past 10 years. He is there all the time and all the way! Things I never thought I could survive He brought me through. Having such a close relationship is the best way to live. I believe when He knows I am ready for a church relationship He will take us there.

Today is our cat's birthday!!!! Or as close as we can figure! He is 2 years old!!!! Sure love our kitkat! He makes us laugh!  He is so fun unless he gets outside. Not so fun. Totally spoiled!

Well, tummy is growling. Must be breakfast time.  I hope you have a great Saturday and Sunday! We don't really have plans. Last weekend was so busy it is nice to be calm again!  Thanks for stopping by and reading my mind.  Please feel free to leave a comment below this post. Love to hear your mind too!